Borderlands - I Am a God Mod.

so i said the storyline sucked. but i didnt say the weapons did.

so. in the game, weapons can come from 3 things.
cooking, cleaning, and vagina.











actually. they come from
1. vending machines




2.creep drops
3. Weapon crates


all 3 have chances of dropping the world's most god modded weapon.
well, not really. weapons are generated by type , quality (level) and of course, their effects and stats. why am i explaining this to you? because there are many thousands of weapon combinations.

you see, the engine generates weapons by frankenstiening weapon parts together.

smg grip1 + smg barrel 3 + smg body 2 + smg scope 5 + accessory + smg stock 3 + other random shit = a smg dropped.

although some weapons have fixed effects, the above stated are all randomized.

so, the chances of a god modded weapon dropping....

are minimal.

hence, i decided to take POTENTIAL god mod weapons ( which means they were already god modded to begin with)

using a save file editor, god modded. them.

this is a snifer wifle i got from a vending machine for 1.5million dollars.



and this r the godmod.





lul. also it has infinite ammo.



when you start fighting crimson wussies, you require acidic weapons. more specifically, powerful ones. since im playing as the class of the gods, hunter, i require snifer wifles and revolvers that are quick, kewl and also that go boom.

hence we have :


YES, THIS IS THE FUCKING GUN THAT NEEDS 4 MORE DAMAGE TO BE 1337


and




if you're feeling lazy, tired of aiming?

don't worry, these SMGs go on even after you grow old and die, and by that i mean they have epic fire rates and infinite ammo i.e they dont use them.




corrosion no good for bandits and animals and shit?

no worries :



when you just want pure undulated damage, we have them too!



oh yes, this guns are frankestein guns :
meaning i combined different parts of different guns to them. they dont look like it, but they have sniper rifle stocks and scopes, smg bodies and assault rifle barrels.






now, time for pure showing off of my god modded weapons.

need pure damage in a jiffy against guardians?

we have them.



BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBUUUUUUURN




when you think you need some russian goodness in your hands, you have the :



sometimes, you find that you need to live abit longer to show off your guns.

hence, you need a good shield.
disclaimer : i did not mod this shield.




this is some shit that like makes your skeelz 2x more powerful.
its a mod that mods you.
note : this r modded.











WHEN YOU RUN OUT OF AMMO WITH MY INFINITE AMMO GUNS,
SOMETIMES, YOU JUST NEED TO USE YOUR FINGERS AND A LITTLE IMAGINATION.


PEW PEW PEW






Disclaimer :
90% of these items have been god modded or frakensteined. do not try to gun run these weapons out .


also, all of my guns are bastards. why?


TORGUE! Bastard Guns for Bastard People! - Greatly increased damage.

i r modded it onto every gun, niggah.

alright, for the lack of legitimate content

this blog has none. legitimate content is banned.


now, time for some raging.

i've been playing borderlands for a month or so now. i've finished the storyline, gotten like 20 or so oranges and gay weapons.

so, what have i achieved over the month.
apart from enlarged epeen from looking at forumfags bragging about their pathetic weapons and then looking at mine, the storyline was abrupt and sudden. the sudden ending of the story with no apparent reason and then restarting of it is...... a lazy finish.


the weapons are cool, i can give that, the apparent focus on FPS is good, RPG elements are good too, all are ok except for the storyline.

FFFFUFUFUFUUUF

What shitty OS cant even right click.

this is win.

Lime : Vista has a problem.

Lime : I can't even properly right click a fucking folder.

Lime: what shitty os cant even do something so simple

IanDao: lol

IanDao: i know one

IanDao: mac

Post

most of you would expect me to post about my OBS camp.

well, you're wrong.

i'm going to post on how there is delicious cake on the campsite behind our current one and you must get it by going around the island on a kayak.

yes.

it rained 2 or 3 times and i had to gtfo my kayak to pee in the open sea. it r not ez.

then, it r becom the delicious cake has moved to camp site 1 and u has to hike 16kilo with a gay bag on your shoulders instead of only 1.5kilo.


kthxbai.

Channels News Asia cant news for fuck

Channel NewsAsia can't tell the difference between Maple Story, a 2D side-scrolling MMORPG, from Prototype, a 3D third-person shooter.

The channelnewsasia.com news post ("Sale of illegal virtual currencies cause 1,000 Maple Story accounts to be frozen", 26 October) reports that 1,000 Maple Story accounts were banned for participating in real money trade (RMT), the practice of selling virtual currency for real cash.

It's really funny that Prototype should be shown in the news photo, not only because it is NOT the game described in the article, but also because there's nothing to trade in Prototype! Perhaps this reveals the mainstream media's attitude towards gaming: that every game is the same and that they're all bad.

There was also another issue, but one that is not strictly Channel NewsAsia's fault. Google Ads are generated based on the content of the page on which they are displayed. Still, it was rather ironic to have meso (the Maple Story in-game currency) selling services being advertised at the bottom of the article..












copy pastaed from :
http://gamesync.net/article/1020717/cna-cant-differentiate-between-maple-and-prototype

Magic : The Gathering

so recently i just started playing magic.

for the lulz and all, you understand.

so, naturally, i wanted to know whats with the long history.

so i took a look at the alpha - test cards.




wat.

so does this mean you take an extra turn or does the opponent lose the game on the next.

oh, and also, for the older cards (like 2000 and below) it is possible to see horrible images drawn with colour pencils as the card image.

such is the most popular card game in the world.

meh.



anywayz, apparently, the game is played with life points. same with YGO, i had difficuklty tracking my 20 lifepoints at some points and use this to my advantage =P [hehehe]


anyway, its just a lulzier version of duelmasters, just more complicated and more mindfuck.

theres a card that says,

discard half of opponent's deck.
DO EET.


and it can be played in 4 or 5 turns.

and u can have 4 of that card.


and there are some cards with similiar effects but different names, so u can put those in too.


moral of story ?

old, babyboomer, retro games are weird.

wat

91 for history?

nou

In Valve, DoTA is YOU!

SO I HERD ICEFRUGZ IS TEH IN YOUR VALVES, MAKIN YOUR GAEMS.



to tell you the truth, i was surprised.


















I always thought dota was a silly map.
Citation : http://gamesync.net/article/1020696/dota-dev-now-working-for-valve

New : Weekly Interviews

Today, i am somewhat lazy to announce that i would be introducing the weekly interviews with several prominent figures.

for today's interview, V is delighted to be here on with me tonight's show.

ID : so i heard you have several identities over the course of your life.

V : Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of fate, Indeed, i did play several very interesting characters over the course of my career. I am, of course, currently retired, but that may change anytime.

ID : What have you to say about your character played in "V for Vendetta?"

V: his visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a bygone vexation stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition!

ID : What is your stand on the recent natural disasters that has happened in Indonesia?

V: The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. We should exact such vengeance on the Earth itself ; Suck it dry!

ID : thank you V for your time.

V: Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V.

A new post Entitled "A New Post Episode IV"

Bitch Biker's Groin to the Galaxy

A Long Time Ago, In a galaxy, far, far away....



It wuz a perod ot sivil wur. ruble spakestrips strikin frm a hidon base,
has wun teh frist battel aguinst teh peevil galaxtox emperire.

jooring teh battul, rubble speznatz manag too stolen teh sekrit pluns to the galaxtox emperire big big ultimute wepons, the doofstar, an amored space staton wit enuf powah too destro ant enture plunat.


persued bai teh umpire's sinistur agens, prancess leia races hume aburd hor starshap, cuntodian of teh stulun pluns tat cun saved hur poples n restore freedum too teh galaxoy.

- 9001 entries detected,
Bitch Biker's Groin to the Galaxy


Further Reading :


Star Burst Episode IV : A New BoomZ [Boomz Boomz Powz Edition]

FallOut 3: The Third Rendition of a similar game named Fallout 1. [has Pew Pew inside]

WELL I SAY [2part]

this post is to remove the pirate song.
apparently, after removing the link from the post the ninja pirate was still there


i was cleaning up my hard drive on this fine morn and what do you know,

i found a file that is 2,110 000 kB huge.

thats right folks, 2GB notepad file .

apparently, its a file created by killingfloor after every killingfloor game u play.


i forgot about it until now.

i supposed that is what one gets when

anyway, big lulz all around.
click to enlarge.

so i was going to try out a couple of games

so i decided to come up with a rating meter for lulz.

100 point system, 6 categories.



/20 -------------- Gameplay Factor

- is the game good to play? is it tedious to play?
- are the controls convuluted
- is game challenging, engaging and interesting


/15 --------------- Replayability

- Simply put : can you play the game over and over and over again and not get bored of it.

- is there "random" generation of random content to keep the game going


/10 --------------- Graphics

- are these hastily rendered shaders or a beautiful, meticulous environment



/15 --------------- Content


- Does the game has a stupid storyline or none at all?
- Are there a lot of collectible items you need to find?
- Lots of weapons, items, equipment etc.


/20 --------------- Element of Skill / Lulz Factor

i put a lot of emphasis on this point because i believe games that do not utilise player skill is a retarded button mashing game. you do not improve yourself, nor do you have any actual fun by beating anybody just because you played more than them. (MMORPGs)

- Do you require some sort of a level of skill or is it just a button masher?
- Do you get entertained (lulz) by the game by using your skeelz against others.
- Can the game be easily mastered or hard to master that only a few elite people are winning? [this depends on context]


/10 --------------- Frequent updates and downloadable content

- this is important to keep the playerbase happy and entertained




my next review will be on the game left 4 dead.

kthxbai




Reserved.

When it gets to the point of not having a point

either come up with one, or stfu.

because spinning a story with no story is absolutely time wasting.



what do people put in books these days.
i've read 4 books which im not going to name that are supposedly good.
plot lines do not make sense. for every 5 sentences there is 4 and a half as filler.

a plot that is understandable and "good" does not make it a !good! plot.

example :

A guy's mother dies so he goes to Antarctica to tame penguins.

Understandable? Yes.
Summarizable? Yes.
Does it makes sense? No.


if u want sci fi, go ahead.

but please, mother fucker, do not.


i repeat.


DO NOT.


FUCKING GOD MOD YOUR STORY.



character A : i is being defeated by "_____".

/Character A has gained some unknown or gay advantage due to circumstance created by the author

character A : WOOT!




FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUU-

SUBWAY EAT FRESH

Subway : Eat Fresh ( prince of belair)


THERE IS NEWS OF SUBWAY HAVING KIDNAPPED THE FRESH PRINCE OF BELAIR AND ARE NOW MAKING CLONES OF HIM AND SELLING HIM AS HAM AND TURKEY BACON.

So I heard mudkips like you.

that was the case when i visited soviet russia in 1943.

i tried to buy a piece of bread but the bread said,

you can't buy me!
i have an reservation!


i was surprised but it wasnt as surprising to have a bread talking to me like that, you know! I am, after all, a highly superior intellectual being with a higher purpose, such as eating to stay alive.


suffice to say, i was angry for being spoken so rudely by a lowly non- living lifeform, and hence, i ate him.
with his last dying breath, it screamed.

I'LL BE BACK!



i was about to express my doubt at this statement when suddenly, a red car that looks like a red star (or its covered in red starz) crashed through the shop glass window, mowing me down, and crashing into a stairs leading upstairs before getting out



fortunately, nobody told me that being run over by a car causes nearly instantaneous death, and hence, i survived.


a man got out of the salubriously painted vehicle. it was a soviet with a gun that was unsafed and aimed in my general direction, not that he wasn't sure i was dead.

I COULDNT BELIEVE IT! TO SEE A REAL, RUSSIAN, SOVIET IN REAL LIFE. I COULDNT HAVE WISHED FOR A BETTER CHANCE TO TAKE A PHOTOGRAPH WITH HIM, AND SO I DID.



Can i have your photograph sir?

i asked. he replied,

sorry, do you have an reservation?



of course, i didnt, but i soon found out it was a rheotical question as he cocked his gun for the about 36th time since he got out of the car.


he pulled the trigger. i closed my eyes.



I WAS ALIVE!


i looked around me and i found out he has already ejected all his bullets out of the chamber due to his excessive cocking of his gun and the last has jammed.


the soviet dropped his gun. he took a menacing step towards me, about to beat me up, i suppose. i was still lying on the floor.


i chided myself for not thinking of getting up before.


suddenly, the soviet screamed.




i looked on in awe as he fell down the flight of steps leading down to me and onto a bullet.

there was a muffled bang sound and i knew he was dead by accident.




and with that, i concluded my defence to the soviet attorney.

stalin was sitting in the judge's seat.

he declared me guilty after wiping the drool from his mouth after he woke up.


i was bundled into a car, handcuffed and surrounded by giant security bears.

i asked one of them where we were going.

he said 'You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air'
i said alright and
I whistled for a cab and when it came near
The license plate said 'FRESH' and it had dice in the mirror
If anything I can say this cab is rare
But I thought 'Now forget it' - 'Yo homes to Bel Air'

I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8
And I yelled to the cabbie 'Yo homes smell ya later'
I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there
To settle my throne as the Prince of Bel Air

I refer to your Suggestions.

I refer to your latest discharge of plebeian verbiage; in which, you have proven, once again, that there is no such thing as unutterable nonsense. You should offer your posting style to hospital operating theatres as a highly-effective alternative to unconsciousness-inducing medications.

If there's an idea in your head, it's in solitary confinement. You could type every thing you know on the subject on back of a microscopic postage stamp and still have room leftover for a shopping list. A long period of non-posting would be most welcome on your part. To quote Thomas Brackett Reed: "They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge."

What possessed you to think that you were capable of being entertaining or interesting to read? Do yourself and everyone else a favor: take a fatal overdose of your medication. Maybe you wouldn't read like such a pathetic loser if you weren't living proof that stupid people should not breed; if your weren't so fat that when you stand on the Speaking Scale, it screams, or if you didn't have a face like a bulldog chewing a stinging nettle while taking a constipated dump in a heat wave. No, come to think of it, you would.



It sounds like English; it even looks like English, but I can't understand a word you're blabbering. Clearly, you spend way too much time in darkened rooms in front of your seven-year-old computer turning a whiter shade of pale. Go outside once in a while and breathe, before your brain starts to rot from all that festering stagnation and cognitive dysfunction.

If brains were gasoline, you wouldn't have enough to drive an ant's Go-cart around the inside of a bottle cap. It's truly amazing the way you never let an idea interrupt the flow of your typing, but then, making sense isn't your area of expertise, is it? Have you ever noticed that whenever you sit behind a keyboard, some idiot starts typing? To quote Martin Luther King, Jr.: "Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity."

You have that certain nothing. Truly, you are about as interesting as watching a slug move slowly across a large rock. Looking at you, Darwin would NOT be pleased to see how inefficiently evolution sometimes works. Maybe you wouldn't come across as such a jellyfish-sucking mental midget if your brain cells weren't on the Endangered Species list; if your weren't so fat that your clothes come in three sizes: Extra Large, Jumbo, and Oh-My-God-It's-Coming-Towards-Us!, or if you didn't have a face that is registered as a biological weapon. Who am I kidding? You would.

In future, wake up the dozy peglegged hamster operating that wheel-powered brain of yours before you start typing.

In conclusion, thank you. We were all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view. Now get the hell out of here!

/Anon

Aha! To be Astounded, an army of assholes, an association armed with an arsenal of ambiguously adult antics. This antiquated armada, more mere attack force, is an astounding assembly of articulate aristocrats. Assuming the collective affliction has not abruptly atrophied, another day of ardent internet argument arises. Under the ambiguous aegis of anonymity all annoying assertions maybe be announced with reckless abandon. Apology? Do not forgive. Alas, I am all aflutter. After the anticipation.... You may call me Anonymous.

The internet makes you stupid

In a recent study made by renowned scientists who declined to be named in this article, it has been proven that the internet decreases your IQ by a WHOPPING number of 1.0 x 10^-9000
every day. this may seem insignificant but thats what THE INTERNET WANTS YOU TO BELIEVE.

this recent study has disproven the widely propogated belief that the internet is for porn.


why?

we will discuss after the below article.

this man was a internet addict who lived in his mother's basement. he bathed once a week, ate 5 times a day, had acne, fapped to pr0nz daily, and has an oily face. also an accidentally-ed face.

Henry Rouwendal was packing his car up one night for a business trip the following morning, sharing his tranquil moonlit driveway with an Italian hoagie (his wife was inside, presumably shedding tears of jealous rage).


Pretty soon the kids will be calling it "mom."

Suddenly, the peaceful evening was shattered by a crushing blow to Henry's back. He crumpled forward to the ground and rolled over to see a black bear deflowering his beloved three meat ciabatta mistress.

Thinking quickly (and with the theme song from The Karate Kid Part Two flowing in his veins), he stomp kicked the bear in the face and neck until it retreated back into the darkness, hoagie in tow.


When asked to describe his assailant, Henry simply said, "He was smarter than the average bear."

Henry managed to crawl back to his front door in just a shade under an hour (the formula for travel after a bear attack is something like 10 minutes per foot for every inch of your ass the bear kicks). His wife, a nurse, tended to the extensive bruising and dislocated shoulder he had suffered, no doubt while the husband demanded she get him back into a shape that would let him plunge into the night to retrieve his sandwich.

I AM THE ONE

My name is Ian. I was born in Thompsons Medical Hospital, Singapore, sometime in the 21th century.

I am the last of the Hitlers.

Once there were many of us. Tens, dozens - perhaps scores, if we count those who labored in obscure unconscious Hitlerdom, the unknowing unknowable Hitlers, the Hitlers who spent their lives as garbagemen or actuaries or dogcatchers in loose uniforms and worn loafers, never knowing the brisk thrill of crisp trousers, the rough thrust of stiff jackboots.

All of us, we are brothers, brothers of peaked complexion and poor posture, of limply slicked combovers and insufficient moustaches, with shrill darting tenor and unusually robust hip flexors. We fell as ash from the sky and collected in soot in the dust and arose again as the manifestations of the Fuhrer, obsidian eyed as we erected a line down the hall of the casting agency to audition for the role of Hitler.

We were a mess of Hitlers, a terror of Hitlers, a roiling looming goosestep of Hitlers. Men are made but Hitlers are born, and where we pale and lumpy failures would have once been tailors or hatters or potters toiling alone in the dank and damp we were now born to a world seething for Hitlers, hungering for Hitlers, Hitlers in cinema, Hitlers in art, Hitlers as strippers.

And I am the last of them, the others long dead or crazy, or crazy in death, buried beneath Iron Crosses and eagles as I alone stroke a greying moustache and brood, wringing memories from the old programs and scripts crackling and crumbling to dust in my fingers, brooding and dying in the dusk, a defiant and cantankerous goosestep down the infinite and cavernous hallways of history.

I AM.

HITLER.


HEIL FUHRER. HEIL NATIONAL SOCIALISM.

Yah so i know i said

so i heard i said before that blogging is a waste of time.

you are right. i have time to waste between gaming and studying and hence THIS.

however, i WILL be regularly updating this shithole unlike last time.


anyways, today's post. enjoy.


IN THIS TOPIC : WE DISCUSS THE IMPORTANCE OF THE EXISTENCE OF KIDS WHO PLAY MMORPGS


what inspired me to write this?

well, i went to a LAN once. nigga faggot kids are hoggin mah l4d PCs playing maplestory. and there were 8 nigga faggots playing maplestory. and they were all screaming at each other.

and the L4d noob players are also screaming at each other, in addition to damaging the furniture and peripherals.

and the kids playing audition are blasting their "cool" game "music".


in short, LAN shops suck when ppl that dont deserve to play FPSes arrive and decide to flaunt their skeelz.

i had an idea. i went to MCCB. i flicked the switch off.

suddenly entire LAN shop grows dark. i steal out of the backdoor, satisfied.

lulz has been achieved.



COOL STORY BRO

Y/N